Turning Points: A Tribute to Mr. Bibb, by Bob Kaufman

Friday, June 3 was graduation day for the Portola High School class of 1966. I was asked to give the Welcome Address that night. I do not recall how that modest honor was bestowed, whether it was determined by faculty or students, but it is a memory I have held with some regard ever since.

The long-awaited night arrived. At 8:00 P.M. the band, positioned on the east end of the old gym, began to play Elgar’s Pomp and Circumstance, under the direction of Mr. Ivan Thompson. Two-by-two, we entered from the door on the west, walked down the aisle in the center of the audience, up the steps to the stage, and peeled off to our seats on opposite sides of the stage. I say we walked, but if I have not conflated this memory too badly, I think we must have looked more like zombies doing that step, pause, step pause processional march. I guess they stopped doing that a few years later ... but that’s another story.

Soon the music stopped. The Reverend Alfred Thornburgh offered the invocation, and then it was my turn. Draped in my purple gown and purple cap with a purple and white tassel hanging down over my left (I think) eye, I walked - more human like - to the podium and spoke:

"This is a great moment in the lives of the 34 students up here tonight. We have worked hard and long for this moment, and it is truly a great reward for our work.

High School Graduation has often been called a turning point in the lives of the graduates. This is definitely true for us. We are on the last step before beginning a new type of life -- a life in a world different from the one we are leaving. Most of us will have many changes to adapt to. Some of us may have only a few changes. But this is a turning point in our lives.

It was once said that "The turning points of lives are not the great moments. The real crises are often concealed in occurrences so trivial in appearance that they pass unobserved."

So perhaps there is a better name for this occasion, something that describes it more exactly. But what is that 'something'?

To answer that question, I propose another. Why are we here tonight? Not to be congratulated for merely living for 17 or 18 years, but to receive recognition for our achievements during those years. That we are on this stage tonight is not unique of itself. Others have been here before us and others will come after. That we are here signifies that we have met some of our society's requirements, and are ready to seek our places as adults and to face other requirements of that society.

So tonight we are being recognized -- recognized for our work, achievements, and success. And without the help that you, as parents, teachers, and friends have given us, this occasion would not be so great for us. Without you, we would not have worked as hard, we would not have achieved as much, and we would not have been as successful. Our work is, in part, your work. Our achievements and successes are also yours. And not only do we welcome you to this occasion, but also we thank you for all that you have done for us.

This is truly a great moment in our lives."

Notwithstanding whatever honor it might have been for me to be chosen to speak first on the program, that is not the purpose of this story.

I recall appealing to Mr. Bibb for some help with what I might say in my brief remarks. As he was prone to do, he offered a quote that I could use if I so chose, along with some brief, general instructions. Then he turned me loose to create a draft. I am fairly certain the composition is mostly my own, but I believe there were a couple of revisions before it was completed.

Nearly twenty years later, I had forgotten the source of the quote. I had a vague idea, but it turned out to be wrong. I wrote to Mr. Bibb and received the wonderful letter shown at the end of this story. The quote was by William E. Woodward, Chapter 3, Part 2 of "George Washington":

"The turning points of lives are not the great moments. The real crises are often concealed in occurrences so trivial in appearance that they pass unobserved."

That quote has held great meaning for me in the forty plus years since (note: this was written circa 2008).  I have experienced it both for good and for bad. It has been a significant part of my philosophy and has influenced many of my life choices. I have gratefully passed it on to others who have looked to me for guidance from time to time. It echoes a favorite scripture that I have loved for several decades: "By small and simple things are great things brought to pass" (The Book of Mormon, Alma 37:6).

Even that priceless lesson is not the most significant part of this story for me. On page 3 is a penciled note "Wed. 6th per. 1:52 ‐ 2:40". That was the appointed time when I met with Mr. Bibb in his classroom and rehearsed the speech. I remember sitting near the door in one of those student desks with the arm on the right side (glad I wasn’t a lefty), as he reviewed my composition, with his red pencil in hand. The red circles, underlines, double vertical lines and slashes are his (certainly the only time I was happy to see his red marks on my paper). He accompanied those red prompts with verbal instructions on where to breathe, whether to use a long or short 'A' sound, which words to emphasize with voice inflection and where to pause for effect.

On the evening of graduation, dramatic pauses notwithstanding, it was over in the blink of an eye, but the lesson I learned has endured the compounding of years. I have kept those cards as a reminder of the care and concern of a great teacher who truly had the success of his students uppermost in his mind and heart. He is one of several we were fortunate to pass along the way.

Thank you, Mr. Bibb. In the language of the present generation, "You are awesome!"

I originally posted this on el Tigre circa 2008. Here is some of the conversation that followed that post:

How great you saved this speech all these years! It is clear why you were chosen to give the address Bob. Well done. All of us are blessed to have the wonderful teachers at PHS. Mr. Bibb, in particular, shaped who I am today. I am grateful for this truly great man, teacher and mentor. Thank you for sharing. - Reply posted by Paula Brown (Buerger) (68)

The cards have more character because of Mr. Bibb's red marks! - Reply posted by Bob Kaufman (66)

I remember when Mr. Bibb came to PHS. I was in his first English class. He introduced himself to the class with his officer's sword laying across the desk and announced that we would now study Shakespeare. We studied Shakespeare. - Reply posted by Dennis Miller (59)

Don't you just love his subtlety? - Reply posted by Bob Kaufman (66)

Dang! And I got him after you guys softened him up. <LOL> Has anyone invited Mr. Bibb to the site? I think he'd get a kick out of it. - Reply posted by Bobbie Burdett (Barbara McNeill 65) (Deceased Apr 2, 2014)

Hi Bob: I sent an invitation to Jack again yesterday (I think) to sign up. I think he would really get a great satisfaction out of the site and all the contacts. - Reply posted by Ray Donnenwirth (50) (Deceased Nov 9, 2017)

What a coincidence Ray, I sent him a personal Email yesterday asking him to join...AGAIN. Even told
him you were still smarting from the " C" you got. :>) - Reply posted by Dan Olsen (59)

It is hard to describe Mr. Bibb , in my memories of him he had so many facets to his character, being a staunch ex‐marine now high school English teacher and Jr. Varsity football coach, in class he demanded your best and nothing less, and you better turn in your book reports if you did not want to have that cold stare from those big blue eyes while looking at you over his glasses, he could make your assignment papers light up like a Christmas tree with all those red marks. It seemed like Mr. Bibb and Mr. Rowden were a team. They cruised the halls and checked all the secret spots that students would be with their girlfriend or boyfriend and intentionally embarrass them. He was always at odds with Mr. Willock across the hall teaching history, as we all know Mr. Willock liked to express himself while teaching at the top of his lungs - yelling, ranting and raving and occasionally jumping up on a chair to make his point to the class. This drove Mr. Bibb sometimes to the brink of leaving the class and going over to quiet Mr. Willock. He was also a very fine coach he gave you the incentive to give your best

performance on the field. I remember seeing a side of Mr. Bibb that I had never witnessed before. It was the day President Kennedy was assassinated, Mr. Bibb was very quiet all of a sudden, then he made the announcement to our class after which he sat down at his desk and held his head in his hands and I could see that he was so upset there were tears in his eyes. In closing Mr. Bibb made me want to be a better person and put my best foot forward. So, Mr. Bibb, I salute you and I am proud to say I am a veteran of these United States of America and you were part of that personal foundation in my life. Ralph W. Kelley 67 - Reply posted by Ralph Kelley (67)

UPDATE: Marcy 10, 2021 - News of Mr. Bibb's passing today spread through our social media community like a California wildfire! The tributes and remembrances are many. We will all miss him and are grateful for the guidance we received from him during those precious years at PHS.

I was able to find the letter he wrote to me in response to an inquiry I made of him in the months preceding our 20-year reunion. I asked for the source of the quote that has meant so much to me all my adult life. I wish I had my original letter, but gladly I have his reply: